So you know how you have things
made up in your head that this is how this will go? It will all be perfect and wonderful and go
exactly as planned. All puppies and
rainbows right? Well sometimes you just
have to take a little detour that takes you a little off course. Something that takes you through the
countryside and lets you see something you had never imagined was there or be
in a situation you never thought you would have to go through. Sometimes you just have to accept what
happens because it was meant to happen that way. There was a reason you took that detour, but
you still end up at the same place you were headed to, it just might take you a
little longer and on a journey you didn’t plan for. But maybe it’s better that way!
My pregnancy started off just like
that. I was an extremely competitive
triathlete, planning for this awesome year to come. I was going to do a 100 mile ultra-marathon
at the end of the year, and try to qualify for the Half-Ironman world
championships for 2012. But something
happened. Something that we didn’t
expect, but would change our lives forever, even though we didn’t know it was
even there.
I found out I was pregnant at the
end of April, probably more like May. I
had already done two 50k trail races and a sprint distance triathlon… all while
pregnant. It hit my husband and me by
surprise but I will never say that it was an accident. Nothing is ever an accident. He was out of town when I found out so I had
to wait two days for him to get back so that I could tell him in person. Talking to him on the phone in the meantime
while I knew and he didn’t was pretty dang hard! But when I pulled out the little newborn
socks and some booties and told him he was going to be a Daddy, we both smiled,
cried, and then it hit us! We were going
to be responsible for a little person!
Were we cut out for it? I surely
don’t know what to do with a damn baby!
I had only recently held my first baby, my niece, only about a month
before. Let alone ever changing a
diaper! So off we went. Detour!
I told my husband I wanted to give
birth at home. He was a little stunned
by it at first but then was completely on board with it. We talked about how we would tell our families
since they were all extremely medical-minded and would balk at the idea of a
home birth. But we agreed to stick by
our decision and defended our positions with evidence. There was some questioning but we handled it
quite well. We got a midwife that could
do the job and so began our journey to meeting our little bundle.
The pregnancy went really well over
all. I was already extremely active so I
continued that throughout the entire pregnancy, taking days off if I felt too
tired or sore from the previous day’s workout.
I ran up until 7 months, then it turned into a jog/walk, then to just
walking or elliptical training. I would
work with weights about 3-4 days per week and got high-fives from some gym rats
the whole time I was in there as my belly grew and grew. I had read and heard that exercising during
pregnancy would help with labor and delivery.
I received excellent chiropractic care the whole time, even having to reposition
my posterior baby towards the end of the pregnancy, and had gone through
Hypnobabies for our birthing technique so I was feeling good about
everything! What could go wrong! I was ready for this! No detours here!
My “guess date” was Christmas
day. What a wonderful gift! As my husband and I were getting ready to go
to his parents house for breakfast after opening our own gifts together, I was
putting dishes away, and WOOSH! My water
broke, mucous plug and all. I thought to
myself, Oh SHIT! But then quickly got it
together, yelled to my husband who was on the other side of the house that my
water broke and went to collect my thoughts… on the toilet J This was really happening! I was going to have a baby! He came to find me a couple minutes later
after he himself had to collect his thoughts and get into his Hypnobabies state
of mind. Positive thoughts only. Everything was going smoothly. I called my midwife and told her what had
happened. She asked me a borage of
questions bout what color the discharge was and if there were any chunks. I don’t know!
I was wearing dark pants at the time it broke so I have no clue what color
it was or if there were any chunks. It
certainly didn’t look like it to me. But
she came to check on me and told me to relax for the rest of the day as the
hard stuff could begin any time during the day.
She told us to let her know as the pressure waves got to be about 5
minutes apart and she would come check on me again.
I put on my bathing suit and a
robe, and put in my headphones to listen to my birthing day CD from
Hypnobabies. Everything was going well
and I was very calm yet excited to see what was going to happen. We never found out the sex of the baby so I
mostly wanted to find out what it was going to be. Baby, come out! I want to meet you!!
I relaxed on my birthing ball as
the pressure waves got closer together.
They were about 7 minutes apart at this point and were only lasting
about 45 seconds to 1 minute. I watched
as my husband set up and filled up our birthing tub and was amazed at how calm
our two dogs were. They would come check
on me every now and then but were not asking to go outside like they normally
would be. They knew something was
happening and they wanted to make sure I was okay. They weren’t going to let having to go potty
get in the way of protecting me.
I had no clue what time it was but
figured it was late afternoon by the light outside. I kept my eyes closed most of the time in an
attempt to remain in my bubble of peace and to concentrate on how well
everything was going. At this point, we
called the midwife since the contractions were about 3 minutes apart and
lasting 1:30 to 2 minutes long. They
were getting more intense and I wanted to make sure everything was okay. She came to the house about the time they
were 2 minutes apart and relatively intense.
She checked my dilation, which was at 1cm. Not much but progressing. I continued my hypnobabies CDs as my husband
also talked me through each pressure wave.
He let me squeeze the ever living crap out of his hands as everything
got much more intense. With each
pressure wave, we would both say “Open! Open! Open!” in an attempt to help
dilate the cervix even more with each pressure wave. The midwife checked my dilation again, which
was 5 cm at this point. I felt like I
wanted to push but was told that it was too early and that I would tear if I
tried to push too soon. So I held back
and continued on.
My husband
noticed something strange about the birthing pool as it was not filled up
correctly. They were puzzled but found
that there was a hole in the liner of the tub and that it would be unsanitary for
me to use it with barrier broken. That
threw a wrench in the system. Slight
detour but we are still on track.
We eventually moved to the bedroom
where I was trying hard to concentrate on not pushing, which was extremely
hard, and the positive aspect of getting to finally meet my baby! With a few incredibly intense pressure waves,
the midwife came to check on me again at which point I was dilated to 8cm. Time to start pushing!! They checked the heart rate of the baby with
the Doppler and all was well. I kneeled
up against the headboard of our bed and got ready to push. Baby, come out!! With each push, they checked the heart rate again. The midwife felt like it was dropping but
allowed me to push a couple more times, checking the heart rate each time. At this point, she started getting vocally
worried and yelled to my husband and me that the heart rate was dropping and
that I needed to get on all fours with my butt in the air and my head on the
bed to take the pressure off the baby for a minute. Another detour…
She continued to check the heart
rate, which at this point was doing okay again.
She then instructed me to push again on the next wave, which I did while
she continually checked the heart rate.
She yelled to me to stop pushing, that the heart rate was at 120bpm and
that I needed to get my ass in the air again.
Hypnobabies state of mind… Gone. She
yelled to her assistant that the baby couldn’t fit through a hole this
small! Um, last time I checked, soft
tissue stretches if you give it time.
And that’s was birth is supposed to be like anyways… A baby comes though
a small hole that stretches and its heart rate will drop somewhat because of
that.
She then shoved my face into the
bed to put me in that position and started asking my husband how close the
hospital was. He said it was only about
5 minutes, at which point she yelled to me that I needed to do an Anti-push, which
was the most painful thing I think I will ever do! She instructed my husband to back the car up
to the front door and for me to crawl down the hallway and get into the back of
the car and rush to the hospital. She
told me that if I pushed anymore, that I was going to kill my baby! WHAT!!!??
Don’t tell a pregnant woman in the middle of labor that she’s going to
KILL her baby by doing what her body wants her to do! But me, not being able to protest for the
intense amount of concentration this took, did what she said and climbed in the
car. The whole way there, I was
thinking, this is Horrible! I am going
to get there and they are going to give me a C-section! What a disaster! The whole trip to the hospital, I had to do
an anti-push about 5 times. Major
detour…
As we neared the hospital, she
instructed my husband on what to tell the ER staff as he drove up… like she had
rehearsed it before and that this was not the first time she had done it. Now, it was starting to look a little
fishy. But I just wanted my baby out
safely. I would deal with her
later. We pulled up to the ER and my
husband did as he was instructed. They
brought a gerney out to meet me and wheeled me, for what seemed like miles,
through the hospital to the birthing center.
I got to the delivery room, where
they started asking us way too many questions about our prenatal care. I was getting pissed. They checked the heart rate, with not nearly
the concern like the midwife had, and told me to switch beds and get on my
back. I did NOT want to be on my back
but did as I was told. It was then up to
the doctor. Was there going to be
another detour? Was I going to have to
get a c-section? Then he told me my
instructions. “I want you to look at
me. On the next wave, I want you to push
like you are going to the bathroom. Then
I will ask you at a point where the head is crowning, to relax and not push to
let the tissue stretch. Then you can
push again.” I was going to have him
vaginally. Naturally! No drugs!
Back up on that detour thing!
This may not be where I wanted to give birth, but it certainly is the
way I wanted to give birth! Baby, come
out! Let’s do this!
It happened exactly like the doctor
said. I watched him the whole time. I pushed, felt baby come out, stopped and
relaxed, seeing my husband watching the whole thing while holding my hand, and
then pushed again when it was time. 3
pushes, it’s a BOY!!! Cut the cord…
wait… We wanted to wait to cut the cord.
Both my husband and I said it at the same time. But the doctor came back and said that since
I had been in labor for almost 23 hours, that the baby had meconium and needed
to be suctioned so we needed to cut the cord.
My husband looked at me and I gave a nod. He took the scissors and cut the cord from
our brand new baby boy. I then told him
to stay with the baby and make sure they didn’t do anything to him that we
didn’t want. No drugs. No injections. No circumcision. Nothing.
I would be fine and could handle myself.
Then it happened. I felt the doctor tugging on my placenta and
out it came. Oh crap. He just did that. He just ripped my placenta out before it was ready
to come out on its own. Not good. But they gave me pitocin to slow the
bleeding, which increased the painful post contractions 10-fold. Holy hell!
I can see now why people think labor is so painful! The pitocin does it! But the fact that I had my brand new baby boy
nursing already and in bed with me safe and sound, made it all more bearable. He told me I didn’t need stitches, cleaned
up, and left the room.
As they were cleaning everything up
and having me sign everything, the nurse checked on my bleeding and noticed
something was wrong. An hour after
birth, I was bleeding more now than I had been in the beginning. She got the doctor on staff (as by this time,
the doctor who delivered me was out the door, probably home already). He discovered that there were still pieces of
my placenta in my uterus and had to remove them. He also told me that I did need a couple
stitches, which was most likely the burning sensation I was feeling. He asked me if I wanted pain-killers because
this might not be the most pleasant thing.
I initially refused, thinking that it would get into my milk and into
the baby. But they assured me it
wouldn’t and that I would most certainly need them for what they were about to
do. They weren’t lying!
I handed my son over to my husband
who cradled him like a champ. So
cute! They gave me a morphine drip and
proceeded to remove the placenta pieces.
I will spare you the details but as they scraped everything out, I
screamed louder than I had ever screamed in my life! Birth without drugs was nothing compared to
this! I cussed the doctor but knew that
he was only trying to help me. The
nurses assured me that he was the best at this and was being very gentle. I’m sure he was but let me get you down here
and I will scrape your uterus out! I
yelled, asking them when the drugs were going to kick in, and they gave me
more. I also remembered my hypnobabies
again and tried to concentrate on my happy place. But damn that hurt!
Fast forward to a couple hours
later as I woke up with my baby nursing next to me in our recovery room. It’s all over! I had a healthy happy, 7lb, 21 inch baby
boy! I just did that! I grew a human being inside of me and here he
was, happy to be with me once again! I
realized what had happened after the birth and began to feel the effects. The doctors came in and told me I had a large
hematoma on my vaginal wall and that it would go down gradually but would be
rather painful for a couple days. They
asked me if I wanted pain killers but I refused them again, knowing that if I
could go through a natural birth, I could deal with the pain.
After a two night stay in the
hospital because my baby supposedly had Jaundice (every baby on the floor had
jaundice that day…), we were allowed to take our little one home. My husband got the car seat, we bundled him
up, and wheeled ourselves out of that place.
Two nights in the hospital with nothing to do gives you lots of time to
think. I thought about everything that
had happened and began to realize what had actually happened. Our midwife freaked out! She had been in practice for 25 years as a
midwife but freaked out! I come to find
out later that we were not the only people this happened to. Two friends of mine who had also birthed with
the same midwife had the exact same experience.
Everything was going fine at home until it was time to push. Each one of them gave birth at home though
since they called 911 and it took the ambulance too long to get there. It was just that convenient that we lived
that close to the hospital. Hmmm. She had already been paid and didn’t want the
liability of giving birth. She told us
our baby was in distress, which it wasn’t, and put the liability on the
hospital.
She came to visit me two weeks
later to see how everything was going.
She told me that she didn’t take into account how good of shape I was in
and that she thought I was going to be pushing for another few hours! I had worked out my whole entire pregnancy
and even discussed with her about how well everything was going, how I had
great muscle tone, and that everything was going to be so easy! She never thought of having me try another
birthing position but just assumed I would not be able to push my baby out. Wrong thought process lady. I’m definitely not recommending her to anyone
I know.
But, the end result, even though
there were a couple detours along the way, is that I have an extremely healthy
baby boy who is thriving and growing exponentially! He is hitting every single milestone at least
2-3 weeks early. He has gotten
Chiropractic care since he was 9 days old.
He is only 4 months old now and is laughing, smiling, almost crawling,
and has just about gotten a couple actual words out. I never thought life would be this
wonderful. They say something changes
when you become a mom. It’s true! I would never have let anything puke on me,
drool on me, or poop on me and have been okay with it. But now that I have my son, life is pretty
good, even if he does occasionally poop on me J
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