My baby turned one

It's so hard to believe that Jacob turned one this week. Where did the last year go? My baby is getting so big! He's walking like a champ and climbing everything he can. He's such a mischief maker but is just too cute. He keeps us laughing all the time!

Remember his crazy birth story. It was the night of January 8th and the 9th was his due date. I had eaten pineapple all day long to speed things up and when we were getting ready for bed I told Tim we had to and get this baby out. We had just finished and I had the first contraction. They were so fast and hard and I had no time to do anything. We called the midwife and our best friends. Tim was busy setting up the tub and since it was happening so fast, I had to help him, with no time to rest for contractions. I got in the tub and told him to call the midwife back and tell her she had 10 minutes. Our best friends arrived and within just a few minutes, Jacob was crowning. He was born EXACTLY one hour and one minute after the first contraction. The midwives made it to the house 10 minutes after he was born. So amazing!!!!

Tonight we had his party, although it was pretty stupid since I didn't have wrapping paper to wrap his presents and all our family and friends are 800 miles away. Here's a couple pictures anyways.

Playing with my new toys



Wondering What comes Next


Ah, Singing comes next


Then CAKE!!!

Friday Funnies *1-11-08*

LADIES vs REAL WOMEN

Ladies - If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up."
Real Woman - If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too **** bad. Please recite with me the Real Women's Motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."

Ladies - Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
Real Woman - Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who cares?

Ladies - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
Real Woman - Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on the couch, with your feet up, eating it anyway.

Ladies - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
Real Woman - Buy boxed mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry for up to a year.

Ladies - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.
Real Woman - Go to the bakery...they'll even decorate it for you.

Ladies - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
Real Woman - Sara Lee frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust, so I just don't do it.

Ladies - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dish washing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
Real Woman - Go ask the very cute neighbour guy to do it.

And finally the most important tip...

Ladies - Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
Real Woman - Leftover wine??

Too small to deliver

How many of us have heard about friends or family members who say that they were to small to deliver their baby or that their baby was just too big that it was dangerous? Last night I was doing some studying and researching and came across some truly amazing women! This site is fully of stories and pictures of homebirths in Tijuana. The following are all women who are approx 4'5" and VERY tiny and they all gave birth to beautiful (and sometimes large) babies. The female body is truly an amazing creation!! When I hear a woman say her baby was 'too big' I will forever be reminded of these Mexican women and their amazing strength!
http://homebirth-only.com/TooSmall/TooSmall.htm (Please be aware that there are GRAPHIC birth pics on here.)

Dear Non Pregnant Person

~Author Unknown~


Dear Non-Pregnant Person,
I hope you find these guidelines helpful in your interactions with pregnant women as failing to follow them may result in serious physical harm. If you are thinking, surely she doesn't mean me- then you should probably read this twice.

1) The appropriate response to a couple telling you they are having a baby is "Congratulations!" with enthusiasm. Any other response makes you an ass.

2) Through the wonders of science, we now know that babies are made ONLY by the mother and father- not grandparents. Unless the baby is in your uterus or you are the man that helped put it there, you may not ever use the phrase "my baby".

3) On the same note, unless you made the baby as defined in #2, the pregnancy, birth and raising of the child are not about you. You do not have input. No one wants to hear your opinion unless they ask for it.

4) The body of a pregnant women should be treated the same as any other body. You would not randomly touch someone's stomach if they were not pregnant, nor would you inquire into the condition of their uterus, cervix or how they plan to use their breasts. Pregnancy does not remove all traces of privacy from a woman.

5) Likewise, no women wants to hear comments on her weight- ever. A pregnant woman does not find it flattering that you think she is about is pop, must be having twins, looks swollen or has gained weight in her face. Telling her she looks too small only makes her worry that she is somehow starving her baby. Making such comments invite her to critique your physical appearance and you may not act offended. The only acceptable comment on appearance is "You look fabulous!".

6) By the time we are 20-30 years old, most of us have picked up on the fact that the summer is hot. We are hot every summer when we are not pregnant. We don't need you to point out that we will be miserably hot before the baby comes.

7) There is a reason that tickets to L&D are not yet sold on Ticketmaster. Childbirth is actually not a public event. It may sound crazy, but some women really do not relish the idea of their mother, MIL or a host of other family members seeing their bare butt and genitals. Also, some people simply feel like the birth of their child is a private and emotional moment to be shared only by the parents.

8) Like everything else is life, unless you receive an invitation, you are NOT invited. This includes doctor appointments, ultrasounds, labor, delivery, the hospital and the parents home. You do not decide if you will be there for the birth or if you will move in with the new parents to "help out". If your assistance is desired, rest assured that you will be asked for it.

9) If you are asked to help after the birth, this means you should clean up the house, help with cooking meals, and generally stay out of the way. Holding the baby more than the parents, interfering with breastfeeding and sleeping schedules and making a woman who is still leaking fluid from multiple locations lift a finger in housework is not helping.

10) The only people entitled to time with the baby are the parents. Whether they choose to have you at the hospital for the birth or ask for you to wait three weeks to visit, appreciate that you are are being given the privilege of seeing their child. Complaining or showing disappointment only encourages the parents to include you less.

I'm not the exception

I am *not* the exception
I am the norm.My birth is normal~~unhindered~~standard~~regular~~easy~~simple.
It amazes me how when people hear about my birth experiences, they are amazed that a birth can be like that. They say things about how I must not have had contractions NEARLY like they did. They say things about how their birth was so painful that even the doctors were astonished by it. They say that I am so brave (or maybe so stupid to risk what I did).
Yes- it wasn't in a hospital. No doctor was there telling me to push when I didn't feel like it. No pelvic exams to check my dilation and progress. No emergency, no drugs, no nurses telling me to count to 10 and then blow. No c-section, no forceps, no episiotomy, no stitches. Just my husband and I along with a midwife who sat on the bed and watched. Its been 2 years since my first homebirth. It's been 2 years since I reached into the water, between my legs, and pulled the baby out and to my chest. I've loved telling my story and talking to women who are unlearned in this area. Educating a woman about her body and how it functions is a new found passion of mine. Isn't simply sad that women have truly no clue on how their body works. The brainwashing needs to stop. After learning about the history of obstetrics, it infuriates me to no end how these professionals feel the need to manage something unmanageable. Just recently Asia Carrera (who is a former porn star, true) had a UC (unasisted childbirth...no doctor, no midwife, NO ONE but her and her daughter). Her story is simply beautiful and perhaps she can enlighten the rest of the world in discovering how their own bodies can function. Of course, many will write her off because her former porn status. She is still a woman who reached deep within herself to deliver her baby into an environment that wasn't hostile and full of noise and lights. She birthed her baby on the floor in front of her fireplace! How truly romantic and peaceful!
Those of us who birth this way know that we aren't alone. We know that the homebirth idea is becoming more and more popular as women are seeing themselves as the empowered creatures that God created us to be. Yet to many, we are some strange breed of creatures. I hope that in the future, women will realize that deep within them lies a strength to birth in a new found way. That they will understand that the 'emergencies' they face in the hospital setting are often times CREATED by the hospital staff through the various interventions. Pitocin to speed things up, often cause such INTENSE contractions that epidurals become almost mandatory. Pitocin contractions don't cause the cervix to relax enough during contractions, which makes c-sections almost inevitable. Epiduals can often slow down labor and progress as well. When the female body is left to do what it knows to do, it normally functions in a way that delivers a beautiful baby with little effort and must ease. I am *not* the exception.

Where are the mice when I need them?

Today my husband and son are off on a long bike ride together. It's much needed father and son time but they keep sending me pictures of views along the way. It looks so nice, peaceful and relaxing, despite the work required for the ride. The girl who lives with us (takes care of the kids while my husband and I are in school) is laying outside in the hot Georgia sun, working on her tan. It must be nice to leave everything in this household up to me. While they are enjoying the weather, I'm washing and folding TONS of laundry, taking care of the other 4 kids, made everyone breakfast and lunch, then cleaned up those messes, getting ready to start dinner, etc. I feel like Cinderella when she got the invitation to the ball. She was so excited and then her evil stepmother and stepsisters gave her tons of chores to do with an 'understanding' that if she got it all done, she could go to the Ball as well. Cinderella knew it'd never get done and knew her time wasn't coming. She'd never get to go and her "me" time and enjoy the Ball. Then the mice came along. They helped her prepare a beautiful dress (although her sisters later destroyed it). They helped her in her work. Where are the mice when I need them? When will my time come to go out and just blow off an entire day? Why does it seem that the world goes on for everyone, except a mom. Sure, when I mention this to DH, he'll tell me to go and have some time alone. About the time I get to Starbucks to enjoy a White Chocolate Mocha with an extra shot of espresso, he'll call to ask where the diapers are. Shortly after that he'll call and say that one of the kids is poopy. Before long, my whole time alone is filled with all the problems of the day, followed by a phone call asking when I'll be home cause the kids are hungry. The world would have stopped for Wicked Stepmother and Stepsisters if it wasn't for Cinderella. 'It's the end of the world as they knew it' when she stood up and took time for herself. Life would completely have fallen apart. Thank goodness the mice helped her out and she was able to have that moment at the Ball. Her life changed when she was given that few minutes to herself. It's something that we all need. We all need to find that time alone and be refreshed. We all need time where we aren't bothered with the hassles of life and can just focus on ourselves. As moms, we give and give and give to everyone else and have little left over for us. I want to work out, lay in the sun, become the woman I want to. I want to lose weight, dress nice, be the cute girl that my husband fell in love with. I want to captivate him, entice him, draw him in in ways I haven't done since I was 18. Instead, my boobs have fallen, my stretchmarks are ever present, my hair is a mess, there are spots on my shirt. I want to be like my babysitter laying out in the sun, going on her daily runs, just to keep up her girlish figure. I want to go to the library like she did yesterday, just to get away. I want to have girlfriends to just go and have dinner with. But life is here and my life is a different reality. Someday, my mice may come and my Fairy Godmother may wave her magic wand and my husband will be the Prince Charming that swept Cinderella off her feet. For now, I'll just sit and look at my pumpkin and dream of the day it's a beautiful carraige. My life is good. My kids are amazing. My husband really is adoring. My home is nice and my bills are paid. What more can a girl REALLY ask for? It's not always the fairytale that we dream it to be, but it's always good to know that we really are a princess at the core. Keep dreaming of the day your chariot comes. Keep dreaming of the day you waltz with your prince. Keep dreaming of the day your life becomes what you always dreamed it would be. It'll come....if you just keep believing.

Know your rights RE: vaccinations

Did you know that while all states say it is mandatory to have your child immunized, that it really isn't mandatory? Did you know that all 50 states have waivers of some form or another? This is something that school systems don't let you know when you go in to register your child.